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Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

• Thread starter Enriku
• Start date Nov 11, 2014

• Registration without invitation will be closed throughout June.

• #95,721

Who's to blame for Buffalo now? You guessed it! Gamers. Bob retweeted every single one of these tweets in this thread.

Thinkers vs Believers.

• #95,722

I'm a Gen-Xer and loved going to Pizza Hut as a kid. But I grew up and I can count on one hand how many times I've been to a chain pizza place in the last 20 years.

Hell I know which of my local mom and pop's pizza joints have the best pizza vs the best hoagies, vs the best salads, vs the best pasta dishes so I order accordingly to my desire at the time. Because I'm a fucking adult.

Jesus Christ Blobby really is a man child. I know it shouldn't be a surprise, but it still astounds me how much of a stunted mental moron Bobert is.

Exactly. Bob grew up in a time when pizza joints looked like 1920's speakeasys and were probably the classiest places that Bob ate at all year. (There was even a chain called "Godfather's Pizza" that capitalized on this image.) According to this video by Company Man, the reason Pizza Hut declined was because it was slow to embrace Delivery and it stopped catering to its core customer base: families. So Bob is actually right, in a way. The problem is, the reason they stopped catering to families was because they were losing money doing it and so, wanted to appeal to bugman millennials like Bob instead. (Incidentally, If you want to attract families, you're going to have to drastically change how you do things -like the way Pizza Ranch turned itself into an All You Can Eat Buffet that offered pizza to order and fried chicken and salad bars. But that's a horrible place in flyover country that caters to the Mayonnaiseghoulen. They'll even pray for you if you request them to do so. Bob wouldn't be caught dead in such a Godbotherin' place, despite the fact that it's a Cowboy-themed version of the restaurant he grew up with and loved.)

The only way Pizza Hut could make itself a worse place to eat is if they followed Chris' advice and installed a bar with wall to wall Sports TV screens. I personally regard eating out as a treat, and I assiduously avoid restaurants that blare loud sports crap over TV speakers, in the same way I deliberately avoid gas stations that blare loud ads at me while I'm pumping gas. I want peace and I want to enjoy my food in a place with good aesthetics and a quiet ambiance. Pizza Hut would be better off just being a takeout/delivery place than turning into another sportsbar with shitty acoustics and obnoxious patrons. But then, Chris couldn't kill his braincells there with expensive hipster booze, which is all he really wants to do.

• #95,723

Bob unironically claiming a fifth Shrek movie would make a billion dollars is one of the most retarded things I've ever heard. Shrek 4 came out twelve years ago, Bob, not a single child even knows what Shrek is anymore. Hell, Finding Dory barely cracked $1b worldwide, and that was a fucking Disney franchise that hadn't already had three shitty sequels.

With Streaming, plenty of kids know what Shrek is, especially if they have babysitters who only want to watch kids movies they like.

But Shrek isn't a franchise that people are excited for another. 3 was shit and the fourth one, while pretty good, wrapped things up nicely and doesn't need to be continued. Though considering how many people agree with Bob and think every instalment is good just because it's part of a franchise they like, and parents wanting to introduce their kids to Shrek, it'll likely make some cash.

personally, I think he just wants something else to come out in the hopes it'll make Sonic 3 fail.

• #95,724

Not even that, what does he contribute to the crew? There is that star trek comic about the guy who runs the transporter room, and that's all I can think of. He would just be put in a room where he would do the least damage.

Transporter Chief is still an important role that requires skill. It covers safe transport of living beings that one wrong move would get partially phased into the floor and die. I recall they also are partly responsible for preventing others from hopping on board and managing the engineering crew to keep it working.

Bobby literally would just be the useless waste of space that the civvies sometimes were in TNG.

With Streaming, plenty of kids know what Shrek is, especially if they have babysitters who only want to watch kids movies they like.

But Shrek isn't a franchise that people are excited for another. 3 was shit and the fourth one, while pretty good, wrapped things up nicely and doesn't need to be continued. Though considering how many people agree with Bob and think every instalment is good just because it's part of a franchise they like, and parents wanting to introduce their kids to Shrek, it'll likely make some cash.

personally, I think he just wants something else to come out in the hopes it'll make Sonic 3 fail.

Brainless Bobby only pushes Shrek because he in his own words gets excited when a franchise' sequel numbers goes up and up. This count of contaminated chromosomes legitimately flaps his arms over the numbers going up, and he mentions this in Brick by Brick, when he got miffed Mario didn't do this.

Last edited: May 15, 2022

Flexo

I can't feel emotions

• Highlight
• #95,725

Brainless Bobby only pushes Shrek because he in his own words gets excited when a franchise' sequel numbers goes up and up. This count of contaminated chromosomes legitimately flaps his arms over the numbers going up, and he mentions this in Brick by Brick, when he got miffed Mario didn't do this.

Now that I'm able to pull up my copy, I want to quote these passages for people.

From page 35.

As the new decade dawned, Nintendo had released the Super Nintendo Entertainment System (I got mine for making it out of the Fifth Grade without a single grade below a "C" – ah! the triumph of lowered expectations!) and with it "Super Mario World." I still insisted on calling it "Super Mario Bros. 4: Super Mario World" until "Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island" ended my hopes of seeing the series numbers climb into the double digits.​

Also here's the passage I mentioned earlier about his insane view of movies. From page 38 on.

That there would one day be a live-action Mario movie had been a dream and an inevitability as long as I could remember. He-Man had a movie. Superman and Batman both had movies. Hell, Teddy Ruxpin had a live-action movie! Great things got movies, Mario was the greatest thing, so Mario would get a movie, and I'd get to see the Mushroom Kingdom looking as grand and astonishing as I'd always imagined it. So when I read this official announcement from Nintendo Power—surely the only trustworthy source on such matters—I was elated not so much by discovery as by nearness: I was already waiting, and now my wait was almost over.​

These were the days before the Internet, and thus there was no way for me to access any further news about The Most Important Movie Of All Time other than "it's being made" in between first hearing about it and glimpsing the first trailers and stills over a year later. But that was okay. I knew Mario, and I'd grown up in the golden age of fantasy movies, so I knew what this movie of my dreams had to look like: a sprawling, colorful Mushroom Kingdom; Bowser's Domain, all fire and brimstone; Mario and Luigi in their overalls and caps, charging through forests and tundra fighting live-action versions of the classic enemies; a beautiful flesh-and-blood Princess Toadstool (it would be another few years before Americans knew her real name was "Peach"); Toad… probably some kind of Jim Henson creation, or perhaps a little person in prosthetic makeup?​

. . .[now page 40]

I needed it to be good, because I needed Mario to be as big and meaningful a movie franchise as he'd been in gaming. Getting a "The Movie" was forever, it meant that the character and the story mattered beyond being some brief fad. Mario was not a Pet Rock, damn it - he was my friend, the thing that was getting me through the misery of pre-adolescence. I needed him to matter so that the time and energy I'd invested into him mattered.​

But the film was a flop; a bad movie that died a quick box-office death and heralded a run of awful video-game based movies ("Double Dragon," "Street Fighter," etc.) of which the so-so "Mortal Kombat" was the only thing close to successful (financially, anyway). The movies (and movie audiences) had spoken: video games—even Mario—weren't ready for the big leagues... and eventually even I had to admit it.​

It was a harbinger. Things were changing… and not in a good way.​

Also I just now noticed what the HEADER for one of his book sections was:

OMG. how have we been ignoring these??

Oh man. I'm going to scan through this whole damn thing.

• #95,726

Blobs new twitter avatar makes him look even worse than 10 view just starting out reviewers. At least pretend you have been doing this for a dozen years, friendo.

It's even more sad that he took whatever his camera recorded setting up a review because he wasn't around people. His horrible trying to human smile of the last photo was at least taken by a relative

Mola Ram

Self Righteous Ego Bastard Asshole

• #95,727

Oh man. I'm going to scan through this whole damn thing.

Watch out for Sanity Loss; that thing is worse than The King in Yellow.

Flexo

I can't feel emotions

• #95,728

Watch out for Sanity Loss; that thing is worse than The King in Yellow.

What are you talking about? I'm just working on my genetically engineered wheat that will grow on the moon once we have bombed those good-for-nothing hillbillies....

J/K. I'm actually drunk. (the standard robot protection against SAN loss)

This has got to confirm Bob as autistic, right?

• #95,729

Transporter Chief is still an important role that requires skill. It covers safe transport of living beings that one wrong move would get partially phased into the floor and die. I recall they also are partly responsible for preventing others from hopping on board and managing the engineering crew to keep it working.

I'm of the comic. Chief o'rien at work. Specifically one where they ask him to transport them, then just says something like "Actually, nevermind, I can do it from here."

Mola Ram

Self Righteous Ego Bastard Asshole

• #95,730

What are you talking about? I'm just working on my genetically engineered wheat that will grow on the moon once we have bombed those good-for-nothing hillbillies....

J/K. I'm actually drunk. (the standard robot protection against SAN loss)

This has got to confirm Bob as autistic, right?
View attachment 3286790

I think Bob's autism has been something of a foregone conclusion for a while now.

The reference to afternoon drinking sure is eyebrow-raising.

• #95,731

HOW!? How is he so bad at writing?

The so-called "Console Wars"

One, it's not "so-called". It was called that. Two, console wars doesn't need to be in quotes because that's what it was called and he's not quoting anyone or anything in particular. Three, this is the second time I've seen him use this same exact syntax. The other time was in a blogpost where Bob threw all the busses on Russ Pitts and he said my favorite Bob quote ever.

Every time I think of it I always read it in the snarky and dismissive tone and cadence of Lowtax from this old video of his, only with none of the comedy.

As writing this I wondered how much more he's used it and it turns out it's quite a bit. He mostly follows it up with something improperly in quotes too.
Here's the earliest ones

and a thread about so-called "gamer culture." in which he put the period inside of the quotes

• #95,732

What are you talking about? I'm just working on my genetically engineered wheat that will grow on the moon once we have bombed those good-for-nothing hillbillies....

J/K. I'm actually drunk. (the standard robot protection against SAN loss)

This has got to confirm Bob as autistic, right?
View attachment 3286790

Internet autist? definitely

Autist autist? Doubt it. Robert is a tactless sperg with some weird anger issues for sure, but those come with a shitty personality and some sense of entitlement that was never adressed by him.

The parts Robert comes across as "special" on his shitty book, like his pathetic atempt of emotinal display because of his grandma always comes across as a bad copy of something he saw others doing, rather than a genuine display of his grief.

Maybe a good writer can pull of retelling his last moements with a family member and how he is dealing with the loss in the same book which main theme is to describe a old NES game, who knows, but Robert only managed to come across as weird and rather insensitive over such a delicate family afair.

Again, this is Robert imitating what he has seen other authors do. It is a rather common to see good writers turning their grief into emotional manuscripts, something personal to them that everybody can see and understand their pain displayed in beautiful prose.

But to do that, you need, you know, talent, hard work, re-writes, a good notion of taste. All Robert do is type his stream of consciousness without even stepping back and think:

"wait, did I just said that visiting my Grandma "didn't help any of us" doesn't that make me look like a insensitive sperg who can't even pay a proper visit to a eldery lady?"

No, Robert just though the line looked cool and he went on with his book, because he had pages to fill because he wanted to make a book by all means.

Mola Ram

Self Righteous Ego Bastard Asshole

• #95,733

The parts Robert comes across as "special" on his shitty book, like his pathetic atempt of emotinal display because of his grandma always comes across as a bad copy of something he saw others doing, rather than a genuine display of his grief.

Hmm ... that's one less vote for autism, and one more vote for actual psychopathy.

• #95,734

Hmm ... that's one less vote for autism, and one more vote for actual psychopathy.

Maybe, but even that I think is giving Robert too much credit.

The thing about Robert is, he too much of a basic bitch to be that interesting really.

Yeah, he edgelords over twitter for cheap catharsis, like calling all republicans deranged killers:

And when people press Robert about the "fight", Robert defaults to the "I just want them to not have a voice that matters" which is the basic bitch take whenever the Libs call for "censorship".

And even his "Thinkers vs Believers" shit is just juvenile self-servicing masturbation, that serves more for Robert to delude himself into thinking he belongs to a caste of "special people" rather than having any real aplication in the world, it doesn't go beyond that because Robert doesn't want to think beyond some simple dichotomy of "good guys vs bad guys" so he can exercise his anger without any serious push back.

And even that is basic bitch, Just go to any rando on twitter and chances are you will find similiar behaviour, people go to twitter to get angry and play the "dunk" game.

The thing that made Robert stuck out as a lolcow really was his brief internet fame on the Yahtzee site, and with "fame" came the fact that a lot of people got to see his spergy behaviour and here we are.

The thing about Robert that makes him "compelling" to autists like us is that he is reliable, day in day out he says something stupid, and we point and laugh, but other than that, Robert is fucking boring, he doesn't get to have DSP like sagas or arcs, nor he goes batshit insane like so many other cows and he won't even have the decency to troon out.

The Lindsay Ellis shit was probably the last time something trully interesting happenend to Robert, from now on is just gonna be capeshit basic bitch movie reviews and his edgelord political takes.

Koby_Fish

The advice of the GALACTICALLY STUPID

• #95,735

Pizza Slut? Really, Bob? Man it's like his palate gets worse the more beers he's in. Never mind what a person will eat when high, Bob eats garbage especially while/after drinking.

Liberals are mad that Carlson and Greenwald revealed their not-so-secret plan to replace white people with niggers and spics.
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If you question the federal government's lax policy about illegal entry, you are encouraging, even cultivating shooters.
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How to make a shooting about my black ass?
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We should not censor discussions about The Great Replacement because it is true and is happening right in front of our eyes.

Still, I'm very surprised that Bobby so far did not mention Ga*e**ate.
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The Feds should look for the next spree-shooter in the basement of incels, like...
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Liberals hate Peter Thiel, perhaps because he speaks their innermost thoughts.
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I'd be honest with you. If I could vote, "not caring about Ukraine" would be a big sell to me.

Oh, BTW do you know Vance was responsible for the Buffalo shooting?
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Glenn Greenwald challenges the Democrat's obsession with pouring money into the hole called Ukraine. He specifically singles out The Squad for their two-facedness. He is right that their fans won't ask.
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MSNBC's Stephanie Ruhle thinks cryptos are only ever traded be men. I wonder what she'd think about Madonna's vagina NFTs.
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Musk should perma-ban anyone who uses reaction gifs.

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What Herzog said is not meant to be funny; it is extremely sad. What a dumb fuck.

Anthony Reed.
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Luke continues his discourse on hope. What Bobby posts will not lift his spirit.
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It's all fake Bobby. Only a Wendy's ever got burned down.

---

Bobby rants about how people fails to appreciate the thespian expertise of a mummified superhero. The rant also doubles as the world's most bizarre pitch for Disney+
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This shit is almost one hour long. Enjoy.

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This Whor will make you laugh.
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Bobby, the MCU whisperer:
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Anson Mount accuses James Gunn of heightism.
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I don't know what the fuck these people talk about. Here's the video so you can check for yourself.
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I recommend Greene's The Elegant Universe as a layman's non-mathematical treatise of String Theory (even though String Theory is poorly supported and is likely too malleable to either confirm or falsify). The Hidden Reality is about different scientific / quasi-scientific interpretation of "multiverse" and is largely disposable. I haven't read the other two.

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Star Wars as a political allegory.
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"The Unofficial Movie Bob Defender" is of course the alter-ego of "MovieBob fanclub".

Star Trek has always been "what if imperialism, but woke?", not to mention RAINBOWS.
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Bobby, who worships "creatives", wishes the memo were fake. But The Wrap does not say so,

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Children's cartoon:
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Foodie and business guru Robert Chipman advises Pizza Hut on the strategy of sit-down restaurants.
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Bob in his Big Picture: I hope you found that watchable?
No. No I did not.

We get it, Bob. You have a palate like a cow's backside. Pizza Slut doesn't even do the basically deepfried deep dish on the basic pizzas anymore and then stopped cooking their crusts properly. The ONLY fast-food pizza I even think is marginally ok/like pizza slut USED to be is the Little Caesar's Deep Deep dish pizza. I can't stand the crust of the regular Little Caesar's pizza, either. (Boston Pizza used to be really good, legit, until 1992. Then they fucked everything up. And i mean, EVERYTHING. Crust, sauce, recipes, cheese levels and distribution, toppings, the works. They got rid of an amazing white-sauce shrimp pizza from their menu, disappointing me forever.)

OH LOOK BOB'S CLAIMING HE'S drinking IN BARS AGAIN! DOES THIS MEAN HE'S SHOWING CHICKS JUDY BLUME'S BLUBBER FOR THREESOMES AGAIN? Geez, Bob never learned you NEVER, EVER find "THE ONE" in a fucking BAR. Chances are good you'll find an alcoholic, though...

Saying gamers are inherently violent is a hurtful stereotype. The fact that this man has such a large platform to spread his vile, hateful rhetoric unchecked is concrete proof that gamers are really the most oppressed minority and need to rise up against bigots like Elie Mystal. #GamersRiseUp

Well if pressed, Bob will claim it's the nasty G*merG8ers.

Jesus Christ Bob, get some shades that doesn't show the screen or get contacts you lazy masshole.
View attachment 3285329

He thinks it makes him look cool. Guaranteed. (Also it hides his 1000 yard Rooster Stare).

Not even that, what does he contribute to the crew? There is that star trek comic about the guy who runs the transporter room, and that's all I can think of. He would just be put in a room where he would do the least damage.

How mant NRA card holders have committed mass shootings? Cause even as a canadian, I'm pretty sure that number sits at 0. At this point it should be mandatory.

Also, don't take anything people who want stricter gun laws say as serious, especially when they are canadian. 98% of all firearms related crimes are done with illegally obtained firearms, but they think making it harder to get guns will stop that 98%.

At this point it's not about stopping crime. Just look at the prolific offenders, some of whom aren't using guns, but even the ones that are are just getting slaps on the wrist. The only time a judge goes hard on a gun user is if it's a law abiding citizen defending life. It's about control. Or softening us up for a Dykes Dykes invasion, whatever.

Bob's so dumb, he confuses Judges with Representatives/Senators. Which isn't surprising, since he thinks it's a Judge's job to make law, just like the other two things.

• Highlight
• #95,736

Yeah, this was my experience reading Brick by Brick in the thread for you guys to comment on too. It's always funny to see people forget about the details within, and how they show how blatant Bob is in telling people he fucking peaked at 9 and knows it. Hell, @Flexo , you didn't even get to the part where he openly describes how he'll just watch others do things and pretend that gives him qualifications to talk about it like he does.

He does this with both his brother and sister's gaming exploits. While you're at it, show the world how this fat fucking retard with special needs chimped out at Ma and Pa Chipman AS A FULLY GROWN MAN to give him a better internet so he can read Nintendo Power and tard online.

• #95,737

Counterpoint:

"Domestic terrorism":

If you are opposed to unchecked immigration and globalization, your hands are dripping in BLOOD.

Talking to Ben Shapiro, Senate candidate Blake Masters points out that most illegals are cartel-controlled, hence the proponents of open borders are in effect condoning modern slavery.
Bobby dismisses Masters because he doesn't have Bobby's virile good looks.

An Equal-Opportunity critic, Bobby has a few words for Kimberly Guilfoyle too!

No matter how many artificial pieces she has, she still has a real vagina, unlike your Angels. Speaking of fakes...

Of course trannies cannot make money except by pimping out children for sex.

Luke has seen it all before. Bobby blinds me with his intellectual brillance.

Cancel culture continues to be unreal; it is just bad things happening to bad people like Tchaikovsky.

---

Koby_Fish

The advice of the GALACTICALLY STUPID

• #95,738

What are you talking about? I'm just working on my genetically engineered wheat that will grow on the moon once we have bombed those good-for-nothing hillbillies....

J/K. I'm actually drunk. (the standard robot protection against SAN loss)

This has got to confirm Bob as autistic, right?
View attachment 3286790

I think Bob's autism has been something of a foregone conclusion for a while now.

The reference to afternoon drinking sure is eyebrow-raising.

Hmm ... that's one less vote for autism, and one more vote for actual psychopathy.

I'm pretty sure you can be autistic and psycho at the same time, Just sayin', co-morbidities are a thing.

• #95,739

Blobs new twitter avatar makes him look even worse than 10 view just starting out reviewers. At least pretend you have been doing this for a dozen years, friendo.

It's even more sad that he took whatever his camera recorded setting up a review because he wasn't around people. His horrible trying to human smile of the last photo was at least taken by a relative

Shit quality, blurry as fuck. But it looks like he isn't a balding lardball fucker unlike in the old one, which is why he picked it out instead of going for a respectable shot of himself. We are talking about a man whose worst fear is growing old, after all!

But precisely, it looks almost like he uploaded that shit by accident while testing his camera. Fucking sucks, just like Bob lol!

• #95,740

What are you talking about? I'm just working on my genetically engineered wheat that will grow on the moon once we have bombed those good-for-nothing hillbillies....

J/K. I'm actually drunk. (the standard robot protection against SAN loss)

This has got to confirm Bob as autistic, right?
View attachment 3286790

I can't help but read this and think of that one "My 600lb Life" episode where the deathfat of the week was having some kind of digestive attack during a doctor's appointment, and instead of heading right for the Emergency Room, she headed for the closest Chinese Buffet to stuff herself. Because that's how she dealt with her problems. All problems. Just stuff herself. Never mind the fact that eating would only make her bowel problems worse, especially if there was some kind of obstruction. She didn't care. She needed the comfort of her magic happy drug, and she needed it immediately. Bob is like this with any crisis, only his magic happy drug is Mario (plus booze and an "average size portion of McDonalds.")

It's obvious Bob's amygdala can't handle any kind of stress. And I could understand his making his visit short because he didn't want to break down. But man, look at all of the elaborate description he lavishes on the new arcade, compared to the scant attention he paid to his grandma. A normal person might take a paragraph or two to describe what the woman was like, and what things they did together when he was a kid, and maybe Bob does this elsewhere in the book, but it's obvious in this portion of the text what his priorities are.

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Source: https://kiwifarms.net/threads/robert-chipman-bob-moviebob-movieblob.5873/page-4787

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